Jamila and the Bee(tle)

I'm not really afraid of bugs.

If I see a spider in the house -- I kill it (sorry tree huggers) and move on. My daughter on the other hand is a different story.

She sees a bug and all hell breaks loose. There was once a time a fly got in the car and I damn near had to pull over because she was losing it.

I have tried my best to not instill that insect fear in her so I honestly do not know where she gets it from.

A couple weeks ago, I was faced with two scary bug encounters and I had to remain calm all while she watched.

First -- it was a Saturday -- these swarming light loving beetles appeared to come out of nowhere. They were congregating around every porch light so in order to get inside you had to go toe to toe.

I survived one door and was headed home when I felt something crawling on my neck. First, I thought it was my hair. Then I thought it was a bug. Then I'm like no, no that's my hair.

NO IT WAS A FUCKIN' BEETLE.

So I'm at a red light damn near about to strip trying to find this stowaway.

Kura: "What's wrong mom?"

Damn. I'm caught.

So I instantly play it off. Told her I was itching and tried to look for the beetle some more.

She says was it that bug?

Apparently her little ass saw the bug and didn't warn me since hell it wasn't on her.

So by now I'm still trying to drive but also trying to purposely get caught at every light.

Kura: "Are you scared of that bug?"

Now I have no choice but to man up.

No. I told her and after finally catching that beetle before it went down my shirt... I had to pick it up (eek) hold it in my hand (double eek) and show her I had no fear.

Heart was pounding but I did it. Then i quickly tossed his ass out the window.

The very next day we had another bug encounter.

This one was more deadly. (Ok, I'm being dramatic, but it was serious)

Somehow a wasp got in the laundry room.

Kura comes to me and says umm mom there's a dragon fly in the back.

I go and see this evil insect flying around on its death mission.

FUCK.

In my head I'm thinking: THAT'S A FUCKIN WASP.

Of course I don't say it out loud.

I instead tell her, that's not a dragonfly baby, please close the door.

So now its just me, this wasp and the dog.

Now I got stung by a wasp when I was in like 4th grade. I remember feeling like a razor that was on fire had sliced my ankle.

I didn't want my kids to experience nor did I want to experience it again.

So the dog is just laying there chilling. The wasp still buzzing above.

So I quickly closed the door behind me.

That was between the dog and the wasp.  I ain't wanna get in the middle of it.